Dear Panda pirates,

We already told you about Max’s unfortunate aim and how he knocked over the parrot cage while throwing a mug.

Yeah, and now Pandabeard has threatened to ban me from the pirate bar unless I can find his parrot!

We don’t want to risk it, so we’ve been searching high and low for this blue parrot. At first, we didn’t know where to begin. I mean, it’s not like we can fly! But then Max got the idea to look through the telescope on top of the volcano, so we headed there first.

We looked through the lens and lo and behold, were able to spot the parrot within minutes! It wasn’t so hard seeing that his feathers shined, sparkled, and gleamed, which got our attention immediately. He was sitting on a tree branch in the eerie forest.

We ran like the wind to the forest, but he wasn’t there anymore by the time we got there. The only sign that he was ever there was a lonely blue feather, abandoned on the ground.

Maybe a giant spider ate him?

Or a snake swallowed him whole?

Ella started to cry.

Well, yeah, I felt sorry for the poor little birdie.

And I was sad that I wouldn’t ever be able to go to the pirate bar again. I felt miserable.

Suddenly, we heard a raspy voice: “Elllllllaaaaaaaaa, Maaaaaax!”

Where on earth did that come from? It had to be Pandabeard’s parrot!

We’ll tell you the rest tomorrow!

Be good Pandas,

Max and Ella

Dear Pandas,

Max sure did get himself in some trouble yesterday.

Hey, it could have happened to anyone!

You’re right. Let me start from the beginning. As you know, yesterday we were in the pirate bar – maybe you were there, too. Did any of you happen to see the blue parrot in the corner? With the shimmering, blue feathers? He sure was a pretty one! I asked Pandabeard where he got the parrot and he told me that this is a rather rare specimen as well as extremely treasured due to its unusual feathers. Apparently the feathers are just as valuable as diamonds!

The parrot just flew onto the ship one day and made himself at home in the crow’s nest. I guess he got the wrong idea of what kind of bird he was! Pandabeard: “As my men saw the bird, I could see the greed boiling up in their bellies. They wanted to pluck him clean as a Christmas goose so that they could sell his feathers.” But Pandabeard was faster than they were. He got to the bird before his crew and protected it from a dark fate. Since then he’s protected the parrot, which has been the apple of his eye.

Emphasis on the one eye…

Ha ha, Max. I’m sure you Pandas can imagine how Pandabeard protected and cherished his precious pet. There was a lot going on in the bar today – cups and mugs flying all over the place. And one cup crashed against the cage…

Yeah, the one that I threw…

The cage tumbled to the floor, the door flew open, and the parrot flew right out! Can you even imagine how Pandabeard scolded us for that? To quote: “If you don’t find that parrot and bring him back to me, I’ll…I’ll…ban you forever from the pirate bar! That’s right! You’ll never be allowed in again!”

We don’t want to risk it. So now we are looking for a lost bird. How on earth does a Panda go about finding a bird?

We’ll give you an update this Friday.

Be good Pandas,

Max and Ella

Dear Pandas,

Have you taken a look at the pirate bar yet? It’s at the old harbor. What do you think?

I bet Max is going to be hanging out there in all his free time. He came dressed today with his pirate had and eye patch complete with a painted-on beard.

Hey, that beard looked real!

Well, I didn’t even recognize you at first! Not until you lifted your eye patch to wink at me.

You didn’t look so bad yourself in your pirate bride outfit, Ella.

Did you Pandas dress up at all? Maybe as yetis or punks?

Haha, it’s a bit like Mardi Gras, but better!

Be good Pandas,

Ella and Max

P.S. – New outfits are in! Check them out!

Hey Pandas,

How was your weekend? Are you as excited about the pirate bar as we are?

That’s going to be awesome! Mr. Pandabeard didn’t want to give away the surprise, but he has a pet speaking parrot!

Did you spot him before when we posted the picture of the bar? He’s blue, down in the corner.

This bird just can’t keep his beak shut. We couldn’t really understand what he was saying, but it was something like “Paaaatty” and “Throooooooow”. Sounds like it’s gonna be fun!

We have no idea what’s going on in that little bird brain. What do you think?

By the way, a couple new outfits have popped up in the catalogue. Have you checked them out already? How do you like them? I like the haircuts the best. Hey Ella, why don’t you try one out? You’d look good!

Be good Pandas,

Max and Ella

Dear Pandas,

Since Max didn’t want to tell you the crocodile story all the way to the end, I’ve decided to ask Pandabeard himself to finish it for us.

Pandabeard, there you were swimming peacefully in the dangerous Pamazon. Then what?

Ho ho, what happened next? Make yourself comfortable and let old Pandabeard tell you the rest. I was just about to doze off – the sun was shining warm on my stomach and I could hear nothing but the sweet chirping of little birds. I was slowly falling asleep until suddenly, something grabbed me by the swimming trunks and forced me underwater. I was as confused as a cow on Astroturf! It all went so fast! I wiggled and fought and did my best to try and swim away, but something was holding me tight. I even screamed, but no one could hear me underwater. As I was trying to make my escape, I found a cord. One of my men must have thrown it overboard to help me. Oh, was I in an up-hill battle! Some massive creature had its jaws fastened to my trousers and all I could do was hang onto this cord for my dear life! With all my might and short on air, I held on as my men heaved me up towards the boat. When I was only half-way up, whatever it was that had grabbed me had given up. I looked down only to see the jaws of a a giant crocodile…but without teeth! He had lost them on my bathing trunks! Can you imagine? He lost his entire set of chompers! That one must have been pretty along in his years. We needed a pretty big set of pliers in order to get that set of jaws off of my booty. And I don’t mean treasure!

But they look great in the bar, don’t they?

Yeah, they’re pretty cool! And even better with the story. That sure was a close one, though!

Aaarrrrrgh, you said it. And to think, I got a hole in my favorite swimming suit.

Ha ha, thanks for the story, Pandabeard!

Gladly. Tell me anytime you want another story. An old pirate like me has a thousand more up his sleave.

Sure thing, Pandabeard.

Be good Pandas,

Ella

Hello Pandas,

Wow, the new pirate bar is incredibly cool. What did you think, Ella?

I agree, even though it was a bit creepy- especially the giant set of jaws and the skull on the wall.

Oh Ella, it’s a PIRATE bar! That’s how it has to be! I asked Pandabeard himself about the giant jaws and he told me an incredible story about an adventure with a giant crocodile! It turns out that several years ago Pandabeard set voyage through the dangerous waters of the Panazon river. He decided to set anchor and take a quick dip in the river. He put on his favorite swimming outfit, walked to the plank and did a cannon ball right into the river. Without a worry in the world, he splashed around and then floated on his back when he got a bit tired.

Okay? What does the crocodile have to do with any of that?

That’s the fun part of the story! But Pandabeard might get angry at me if I tell you. Ask him yourself.

Great story, Max. Fine, I’ll ask him myself if he’ll tell the story to all of us!

Hey Ella, I’m sorry. Here, I have something for you…SLIMEBOMB!

Be good Pandas,

Max and Ella

Dear Pandas,

Max and I have been reading the comments lately and noticed that some Pandas have been asking why their Panda has been erased or blocked.

This happens most often when someone else has been playing with your Panda. This is against the rules of Panfu – you’re only allowed to play with your own Panda. This is the only way to be sure that there aren’t any Pandas running around who have been abusing the rules.

Be sure not to tell your password to anyone, so you don’t suddenly get banned because your Panda stepped out of line.

Be good Pandas,

Max and Ella